AMERICAS FOODS TO BE TRIED UPON ON IMMEDIATE ARRIVAL BY RUBYREDD

whatever you contribute to this thread will be placed on a shopping list to be taken with me the first time me and j-dawg go to the 'grocery store'.

also: this isn't just a list for junk food. fruits and veges and stuff that are unlikely to have been available to me in nz can also be recommended.

God those are so gross.

First thing you need do is visit a taqueria where nobody speaks English.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/7/79/Panda_Express.svg/193px-Panda_Express.svg.png

thread for Jeno's (RIP) and Totino's frozen pizza

libcrypt, you underestimate my love of all things higly processed and artificial.

Rubys, you will surely find plenty of amazing things in USA supermarkets, then. It's a bit shameful to think of any of them as particularly "American", however.

gr8080 that frozen pizza stuff looks AWESOME

well i mean stuff that i can't get in nz. and you have to admit that the array of american junkfood is pretty astounding.

CHEESY, SALTY, CRUNCHY, AWESOME

Keep an eye out for Scrapple, Souse, and C-Loaf, tho those more highly available in certain southern USA states.

I wish I had some idea of what isn't available in NZ.

http://img146.imageshack.us/img146/2664/imageuploadimagekf8.jpg

those pizzas are usually less than $2 and sometimes they go on sale for $1. maybe cheaper, food is expensive here so i'm prob. out of touch.

explanations/descriptions plz, libcrypt.

gr8080 those look tasty but also identical to something we already have here. i shall still try them tho.

btw, my ex-boyfriend's wife is a food scientist and she used to work on Totino's pizza rolls.

sara, just assume nothing is available here and you won't be far off the mark.

awesome food/drink combinations

Rubys, they's mostly parts of the pig most folks find too disgusting to eat. They's combined in bricks with various sorts of glues. Scrapple is more homogeneously glued together, while souse is rather gelatinous.

C-Loaf is just a loaf with a C.

gross

i can't wait to see if a mcdonald's big mac in america tastes different to a nz big mac.

libcrypt, i think i'm going to pass on that. my vegan bf will probably appreciate me passing on that, too.

RR, you are making me sad. At least you have all those crazily named candies! ("perky nanas" still makes me smile)

okay we do have some awesome LOLLIES (i'm going to insist on calling them chocolate bars and lollies when i'm in the US), but so does america! i promise i will try to remember to bring a ton with me so i can post them out to all you guys.

Rubys, try olallieberry pie. That's pretty USA-specific, I think and darn-shootin' good.

LOLLIES

Hmmmm, maybe you can get that to catch on here.

jordan s, what are butterfingers

http://stromandfriends.com/bugles.jpg

I am going to have to think about this topic, and possiby visit the grocery store.

You know what, I've been secretly craving a Charleston Chew bar lately, though. I don't know why. So get one of those.

i already got jordan saying LOLLIES

what the hell are OLALLIBERRIES

Note that I have been vegetarian for 20-some years now but wifey swears by scrapple and also finds real scottish haggis a total treat.

Bugles are awesome; gr8080 OTM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s9rbj4idyc8

http://www.nestle.ca/NR/rdonlyres/62433100-3EE1-4B04-945A-7E9C2935435D/0/butterfinger_cta2.jpg

kind of an indescribable taste-- very awesome flaky orange filling covered in chocolate. a must try.

The olallieberry (pronounced oh-la-leh, sometimes spelled ollalieberry, olallaberry, olalliberry, ollalaberry or ollaliberry) is a cross between the loganberry and the youngberry, each of which is itself a cross between blackberry and another berry (raspberry and dewberry, respectively).

(Wackypedia)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWyrOzXoKEc&feature=related

i still don't really know what a OLALLIEBERRY will taste like. will add to my list.

butterfingers sound delishhhhhh!

ah yes CRUNCHY AND PEANUT BUTTERY for the butterfinger

i'm excited to try the whole range of hostess products

Tamarind-based candy (again, MX-ish) is fine stuff. Also, if you can find chili-lime flavored dried split lima beans, they are seriously AWESOME.

I am seriously biased toward the latin side of CA cuisine.

i hope they eat this in NZ:

http://kms9262.k12.sd.us/kraft_macaroni_cheese.jpg

see, wellington/nz in general, is v v limited when it comes to 'ethnic' food. auckland is probably better (since a third of our pop. is located there) but here it's all turkish and malaysian restaurants mostly, esp when it comes to cheap-eats.

there are no ethiopian restaurants here, and maybe like two mexican restaurants (both on the pricey side).

we have prepackaged mac n cheese

a GIS for 'cheetos' without the safesearch filter on is... kind of... REVOLTING

a GIS for 'cheetos' without the safesearch filter on is... kind of... REVOLTING

i feel like this thread needs bell labs and jaq

http://www.rafa.com/graphics/zl303goines-Can.jpg

I will tell you that if you are thinking of trying funjuns and they only have wise onion rings WAIT til you can find funjuns. Then, do not, I repeat, do not exceed fun size!

thanks mookie, i will add that to my list of places to visit.

funjuns?!?!

oh i spelled it wrong.

http://blogs.tampabay.com/popmusic/images/funyuns_2.jpeg

In-N-Out Burger

Do they have avocados in NZ?

we have avocados.

i've heard of this burger place and since i'm a big burger fan it will be at the top of my list.

By a lot of elementary schools in the East Bay there are sometimes churro carts where you can get a bag of them for a few dollars.

svend, you'll be pleased to know that thanks to you and about a 100 other ppl i know who've made reference to oakland being a shithole, jordan now wants us to move to somewhere like alameda or berkeley as soon as his current lease is up in august. this is mostly because he's worried that i will hate it there, thanks to everyone relentlessly badmouthing it to me, even though he really likes it, and moving will be a pain in the ass, and his current apartment is completely awesome, and he totally doesn't want to live in alameda or berkeley.

back to food discussion now.

chez panisse is kind of famous and v. expensive -- save it for mega-celebration

oh man is it one of those places where i'll have to point at the menu when i order because i can't pronounce any of fancypants frenchy names?

no one will mind if you use a cute kiwi accent

yeah i think i'm gonna be heavily relying on the novelty of my accent for a lot of things.

RR have you ever had hot wings/buffalo wings? They are probably the best fucking food in the world.

Try Dickel brand bourbon!

yeah i've had them once before i think, at this tex-mex (i think that's what the style is called??) restaurant here in welly a few years ago. but i'm a baby when it comes to spicy food :(

xpost and i'm a fussy drinker - i had a v v v bad experience with homebrewed bourbon in my teens and can't even stand the smell of it since.

Oh man that is a shame but I can dig.

There are a lot of 'hot wings' that aren't even half spicy.

http://www.wingstop.com/img/content/menu/images/menu07_r1_c1.jpg

Oh man now I want to go to Wing Stop so bad. Why do I do thins to myself?

THEIR FRIES ARE SO GOOD

http://www.wingstop.com/img/content/menu/images/menu07_r3_c1.jpg

your a ccent will get u by in many situations

oakland will be fine. everyone is boring. your boyfriend knows better than the losers on here

Have your boyfriend take you to a good barbecue joint and get a proper rack of ribs.

Do you like peanut butter?

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v287/elysesewell/IMG_8751.jpg

You can eat grotesquely oversized burgers:

http://www.chss.iup.edu/kpatrick/Man%20Bites%20Other%20Things/Clearfield,%20PA,%20Denny

abbott that place sounds yum! i love potato salad and cole slaw!!!!!

and OMG what are those IDAHO SPUD things?? they look awesome.

jergz you are so right and that's what i keep telling jordan.

I <3 PEANUT BUTTER, ABBOTT

seriously ruby the more i think about the madder it makes me. get there, see how it is. i bet it'll be fine. and then if not, move. easy.

i know, jordan had kind of mentioned moving a couple of times in the past, just because he's worried oakland won't be safe enough for me, but this last week he's gotten really serious about it, and i feel bad, like maybe i shouldn't have said anything to him all those times people have gone 'ohhhh oakland' to me. but yeah, i'm excited about moving there and oakland has fuckin cool art galleries and the parkway movie theatre.

what would be really awesome (except not really) is if we moved somewhere lame like alameda and the next day i got mugged outside our new house (i think this is called cutting off yr nose to spite yr own face, but whatevs).

This vvvv

http://img156.imageshack.us/img156/7886/habaspp0.jpg

RR, the chocolate here tastes so bad. coke tastes slightly different. cheese and butter are weird shades of yellow and cream. bread tastes like a tablespoon of sugar. oh and NO PAVLOVA.

but you should try:
Waffle House All-Star breakfast
salt water taffy
any cereal with marshmallows
grits
Mexican food
orange crush
dr pepper (so gross but you should still try it)

theres lots more but thats all i can think of right now

oo...banana laffy taffy

oh -> clam chowder

nilla wafers dipped in cool whip.

jordan just told me that dr pepper has PRUNE flavouring! i was always under the impression it was of the cola family. not sure about orange crush: i don't like orange softdrinks like fanta or anything like that. but that other stuff sounds good, esp the waffle house place. america has cadbury creme eggs and hershey's so i'm not worried about the chocolate. america also has almond roca which just about makes up for anything.

i'm excited about deepfried clams.

http://xf1.xanga.com/f1ed856a64730151183940/z112693178.jpg

i'm also excited about going to one of crab places.

curt1s those look kinda boring - are you supposed to dip them in stuff?

can a get description of 'grits'?

wallpaper paste.

i thought so.

sunny, i don't actually like pavlova.

grits are awesome, esp. with butter/salt/pepper

you could visit one of America's many "culturally themed" restaurants

http://www.typophile.com/files/outback_logo_5055.jpg

you can have pineapple crush instead!

i still think the chocolate will taste a lot different to you.

dr pepper tastes like cough medicine without the fun of cough medicine

another addition: Ben and Jerry's "Phish Food"

nilla wafers dipped in cool whip.

-- estela, Monday, May 26, 2008 9:48 PM (12 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

face dipped in cool whip

<3

what is cool whip

cadbury's<<<<hershey's<<<<<whittaker's<<<<nestle

Cool Whip is a "whipped topping" that people buy and put on their Jell-o or pie in place of real whipped cream. I find Cool Whip to be too sweet/cloying/artificial in taste, but some people do love it.

Nilla Wafers, though, are yummmmm just plain.

Oh, and don't forget to walk into a See's Candy store a.s.a.p. They give you a free chocolate and I am completely obsessed with some of their stuff (scotchmallows, rum nougats, raspberry creams, raspberry truffles...). See's is a West Coast thing, so you'll be in the totally right spot to wander in and try things there at random.

Oh, and their "Awesome Nut and Chew" bars are sooooo good.

btw, I love See's, but would recommend buying stuff at the counter rather than pre-boxed off the shelves, for the sake of freshness.

i love see's mini pops (the chocolate and butterscotch ones, not vanilla though normally i love vanilla).

I'm not sure I have tried the vanilla ones. I usually try not to eat candy that sits on my teeth because I'm totally paranoid about cavities (and dentists).

They have dr peppers in australia, they dont have in nz?

Grits rule. Use butter and salt, pls.

add enough butter and any starch is good. grits are worth a try

The way Curtis describes grits has me thinking of polenta, I guess it's the same family of flavour what with being corn and all.

grits don't really sound like my kinda thing, but fuck it, i'll try them out.

come on guys, i need some more 'healthy' stuff to try, because this shopping list is starting to make jordan worry about my health (he already said 'you're not gonna eat this all right away, right?' so i pouted and pulled the 'BUT IM MOVING HALF WAY ROUND THE WORLD' card on him. which pretty much gives me a license to eat whatever i want and fuck my arteries).

cool whip sounds like the same kind of aerated cream cans we get here (which i adore).

Has anyone mentioned White Castle hamburgers yet?

Also lol Cool Whip, I know the guy who invented it.

RR, cool whip isnt the same as the cans. its totally next level. id be surprised if there was any dairy involved at all.

its one of those "foods" where you eat a spoonful and think "this is terrible!" then you eat another spoonful.

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00004Y6A6.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

^^^ Cool Whip in a nutshell

yes

Cool Whip = tub of processed awesome

Ingredients

Cool Whip is made of water, corn syrup and high fructose corn syrup, hydrogenated coconut and palm kernel oil (CPKO), sodium caseinate, vanilla extract, xanthan and guar gums, polysorbate 60 (glycosperse), and beta carotene.

also apparently the guy I thought invented Cool Whip... didn't???

Dan, are you seriously recommending White Castle hamburgers!?

Cool Whip makes me shudder, but apparently many people enjoy it, so don't listen to me, RR; try it for yourself!

WHITE CASTLE HAMBURGERS MAKE YOUR STOMACH HAPPY, THEN V V V SAD, THEN HAPPY

I am totally interpreting that through the lens of my last pregnancy, Daniel. JUST SO YOU KNOW

gross

Sonic hamburgers! Not sure they have a presence on the west coast though.

xpost Yes, it was kind of gross. Except for the part where food tasted so awesome that I gained a ton of weight, but honestly then I wound up looking REALLY gross, so overall, I'd say "gross" is accurate.

Burgers I can't resist are from Culver's. Their frozen custard also A+++++

oh shit I should get lunch

i used to love sonic when i first got here but now i cant work out why. nothing is appealing except pineapple sundaes

healthy eats specifically for here, ruby? there are lots of course but they're way less exciting to talk about. of course you can go to the organic grocery store and get good wheat bread and fixings but that's BORING

re. sno balls: BAD to eat but FUN to play with
re. dr pepper: YUM! tastes like lipstick
re. almond roca: it's made in tacoma, our sleepy neighbor to the south; you can go to the factory outlet!
re. grits: i will cook them when you come here

i have never ate a sno ball.

grits: MUST TRY. awesome: shrimp and grits. also awesome: cheese grits. so awesome that someone graffitied the wall outside my house.

http://img104.imageshack.us/img104/3388/2402071821vx6.jpg

(sadly the wall's down now, rip cheeze gritz)

yes, cheese grits are very awesome; i will cook grits for all this itrers.

Grits are indeed similar to polenta, but it's a different part of the kernel. A common way to have grits is to cook them twice: Once for regular cooking, then after they have cooled overnight, fry them up in patties. Serve with traditional USA breakfast foods.

I suppose you don't have to let the cool overnight, but it helps them stay together.

Oh, a totally USA thing to have is chicken & waffles, and there are plenty of places to get 'em around here (e.g., in Oaktown):

House Of Chicken N Waffles
444 Embarcadero W
Oakland, CA 94607
Phone: (510) 836-4446

The way Curtis describes grits has me thinking of polenta, I guess it's the same family of flavour what with being corn and all.

-- Trayce, Tuesday, May 27, 2008 2:31 AM (9 hours ago) Bookmark Link

grits are like the southern u.s. version of polenta and are sooo goood

spicy cheese and sausage grits mMMMMMM

speaking of southern food: biscuits in gravy

mexican food also otm

All this grits talk has me thinking about the empty industrial-sized tub of grits my wife brought into our marriage full and how perhaps it should be full again or at least approximated by another full tub.

It's actually Canada that's got the really good sweets: Coffee Crisp, Smarties, Kinder Eggs... mmmm.

smarties:
http://www.shopatmoxie.com/mm5/graphics/00000001/smarties350.jpg
or smarties:
http://candyaddict.com/blog/uploads/smartiesuk.jpg

??

damn. smarties no2:

http://img383.imageshack.us/img383/1123/smartiesukle2.jpg

they sell kinder products here!

I would eat all this giant Smarties.

It's so clear that I have got to get back to Canada, wow.

http://img383.imageshack.us/img383/1123/smartiesukle2.jpg
These smarties!

Re: Kinder products - they're German but apparently rarely seen in the USofA; Americans online seem (rightly) to think Kinder Eggs a source of joy and amazement.. didn't know if they'd made it to NZ.

Hey Im eating a fun size banana laffy taffy right now. Here are the jokes on the wrapper:

From Whitney P in Champaign, IL
17: WHAT IS AN OWL'S FAVORITE SUBJECT?
17: OWLGEBRA

From Connie G in Kent, WA
18: IN WHAT MONTH DO PEOPLE TALK THE LEAST?
18: FEBRUARY-BECAUSE IT'S THE SHORTEST MONTH OF THE YEAR!

?!

banana laffy taffy is the best of all laffy taffys, btw.

Also lol Cool Whip, I know the guy who invented it.

-- HI DERE, Tuesday, May 27, 2008 12:28 PM (7 hours ago) Bookmark Link

RR, cool whip isnt the same as the cans. its totally next level. id be surprised if there was any dairy involved at all.

-- sunny successor, Tuesday, M

HI DERE - details plz

SUNNY - cool whip is a fucking blight on this planet. its literally whipped corn syrup & water & it is horrible. eat it next to actual whipped cream & you will never want it again.

i have and youre right but ill still eat it

No time for Cool Whip. All the time in the world for Reddi-Whip. People in my family have been known to go to the fridge, get the can of Whip, squirt a bunch into open palm, snarf up. Also watching what happens when you stick a big white ZAP of Whip on black poodle's nose: first the contortions to remove it, then aggressive demands for MOAR.

yeah see reddi-whip is incredible. i have no idea why anyone would buy cool whip & never miss an opportunity to berate anyone who does. no offense to HDs buddy who i am super envious of & is obviously a genius if hes managed to pawn that crap off on the populace like he has.

also apparently the guy I thought invented Cool Whip... didn't???

-- HI DERE, Tuesday, May 27, 2008 1:54 PM (7 hours ago) Bookmark Link

ok day ruined`

RR, see ref to biscuits -n- gravy upthread. A USA-style biscuit is like nothing you have thought of as a biscuit up to now.

Other corn-based products to seek out: spoonbread and indian pudding

Also, when I was in NZ, for breakfast I got eggs & chips, which = brilliant but not found here. But here = grits and hashbrowns and great pork sausages and biscuits & gravy. NZ (and AU) sausages were more cereal-filler than is normal over here. Another more southernly thing to try: red-eye gravy, which is made with the drippings from a country ham and black coffee.

we have kinder surprise, and we have smarties - but we also have pebbles which are like smarties but nicer.

yes jaq, the american version of 'biscuit' is radically different from the new zealish version!

Transhemispheric Translation Guide (Fill in the Blanks)

AUS/NZ/UK Biscuit = US/CA Cookie
US/CA Biscuit = AUS/NZ/UK ???? (Very salty scone??)

Also for me:

AUS/NZ/UK Icing Sugar = US/CA ??? (Confectioners Sugar? Powdered Sugar?)

Also RR Cream in a can = Reddi-Whip

sunny, you are such a rotter, i <3<3 you.

also, even though ruby is in nz, and i haven't met her in person, i feel sad that she is moving so far away, this is dumb but true.

even though she is going to nth cali which is nowhere near me and likely a place i will never visit again, im excited -- also dumb but true.

i did the exact same thing as you and ruby, married an american and moved to the u.s., we are like a bunch of nylons wearing, lucky strike puffing war brides.

awww ladies! <3 <3 <3 <3

estela, what is a 'rotter'?

sunny, what sort of fruits/veges should i try that aren't available here?

also, sunny: i really want to travel pretty extensively round the US so maybe we will come visit arkansas(?) sometime.

rot·ter (rtr)
n. Chiefly British Slang
A scoundrel.

it is my idea of a compliment.

we dont have fruits and vegetables in arkansas so i am clueless. come visit memorial day weekend for RIVERFEST. had you been there this year you would have seen zztop AND huey lewis + the news. You must feel dreadful now.

estela, did anyone end up guessing where your husband is from on that guess where estelas husband is from thread? i think i guessed georgia.

The only fruits I can think of you might not be able to get outside the US are US persimmons (not the same as the japanese variety) and some of the variant berries (i.e. marionberries), but these are also difficult to get anywhere outside of the areas they grow. Maybe ground cherries and prickly pear fruit?

DO NOT CONSUME:
American Bread (full of sugar)
American Orange Juice (full of sugar and orange colouring)
American Margarine/Butter (I don't want to know what that's full of)
The McGriddle (I was young, drunk and naive)

DO CONSUME:
Onion Bagels (A+++)
Pizza (dis is da REAL PIZZA, A++++++)
Super Big Gulps (TWO litres of fountain soft drink at a low low price)

DO VISIT:
Panera Bread (I miss the portobelly mushroom and cheese sammich with chippies and free refills)
Cheesecake Factory (what do you mean we gonna have cheesecake for dinner...whoa, wait a second)
Hooters (obvious)

DO HUNT AND KILL:
That dude at the train station that said "is that a New Zealand accent?"

"is that a New Zealand accent?" is American for "I think you're Australian but I thought I heard that you maybe used a certain short vowel sound plus being able to recognize the difference between the two would be so cool, oh, fuck it, I'll take the risk."

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The problem is that the South Australian accent is not too far off the New Zealand accent but like fuck an American would ever know the existence of a South Australian accent. Or the existence of South Australia.

dude i didnt know about the existence of a sth australian accent!

sunny, grady was right on that thread, the answer was los angeles, i meant to say so after the poll ended but i forgot.

repping the west coast on the east coast!

and doing a lovely job.

You should try some american varieties of apple, I suppose...and you're in Calif. so (I think?) you should be able to get grande delicious citrus fruits. Alse American watermelons are fucking giant. Not sure what size they are in NZ. We had some Japanese exchange students at our house, and when they saw out 1.5 foot watermelon, one of them exclaimed, "We are...very impressed...by the size...of your melons!" (I now say this to myself often.)

hahahahahahahaha

The butternut squash is delicious.

Getting into this thread pretty late... I forget to keep checking the other boards.

Anyway, a couple places to check out sooner rather than later:

1. Top Dog: http://topdoghotdogs.com/
If possible, go to the original location on Durant in Berkeley. I love the Portugese sausage dog, but you really can't go wrong with most of the menu.

2. Tillie's Diner in Alameda: http://www.yelp.com/biz/tillies-diner-alameda
Some of those Yelp reviews are asinine, but to be fair Tillie's is shadow of it's former self when the Navy was still in town and there were ten thousand dockworkers who needed diner grub twenty-hour hours a day. The reason to go is the mammoth steak bits and eggs breakfast (pictured here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/quartzcity/811523120/ ). According to legend, this was the breakfast meal of choice for Oakland Raiders linemen.

dude i didnt know about the existence of a sth australian accent!

We say "school" instead of "skwell", unlike you convicts on the East Coast.

Oh, and we buy milk from the DELI!

There's a WA accent too, they say "heyahh" instead of "here". Sort of.

Is cheesecake factory in the US the same franchise as the one here?

No, no, it's VASTLY different. It hardly even has cheesecake even on the dessert menu.

tried so far:
haribo jelly raspberries: average
mint three musketeers: average
chocolate skittles: kinda gross
burrito (from chipotle): pretty good except for the cilantro
clams: excellent
trader joe's vegan choc chip cookies: amazing

i really want to go to taco bell but jordan says they masturbate in the meat. i think he just says that so i'll get a vege taco.

No, he's serious, there's masturbation all over that meat. That's why it's rated Grade-D or below.

coriander is v divisive

hey i kind of hate cilantro too, doesn't everybody?

Okay, I did not even realize that chocolate skittles exist. But yeah, they do sound kinda gross...

xp I like cilantro. Please don't alienate me!

xp
I kind of love it, but I do know a lot of ppl who hate the shit out of it.

If you go to Taco Bell when it's busy and order a popular meal they simply won't have had time to jizz in it. Also, even with spotty teenage boys there are only so many times a day you can manage it so if you go after a certain hour your odds of avoidance are probably pretty good.

Alternative find your local mexican taqueria and at least the jizz will be authentic south of the border jizz.

dont you think cilantro kind of tastes like soap?

It tastes of bleach rather than soap, I reckon. NB I like the bleachy taste.

Coriander only tastes like bleach/soap when it is off, otherwise it is lovely.

Cilantro hate is a defect. I pity you all.

yeah Ned is right, it's genetic

Coriander only tastes like bleach/soap when it is off

Coriander tastes like bleach all the time, and it's delicious.

coriander/cilantro tasting like soap is an enzyme thing in some ppl

y'all. coriander/cilantro is a godsend. deal with it, k?

omg I love cilantro. Cilantro haters = crazeeee. Welcome to the US RR. Sounds like everything is going wonderfully so far. So very happy for you.

just sample my first twinkie. pretty average :(

try a hoho

try a zinger

http://www.chocablog.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/nutty-bar-1.jpghttp://www.taquitos.net/im/sn/LittleDebbie-StarCrunch.jpg

YES WHAT CURT1S SAID

also i think that the cilantro divide is actually how jesus knows which ones of us to rapture in the end times, so you pagan cilantro haters better start some sort of tongue scrape and hormonal treatment routine yo

pffft, if Jesus wants me to eat cilantro, Jesus can eat ...well, cilantro, because it may as well be shit.

Funfact: when I was a kid, I thought the smell of cilantro was the smell of rabies, because I once saw a dead bird on the driveway of my neighbours' house and (I assume) they had a cilantro patch growing in their garden. I smelled it and assumed the bird died of rabies and that's the smell of rabies. It took me 18 years to figure out that it was cilantro!

WWJE?

BB remember the multiple years when we lived on Nutty Bars? good times

i wish i'd gotten the hostess cupcakes instead :( the pig fat cream in the middle of the twinkie is pretty good, but i don't like how the sponge stuff tastes kind of salty.

xp Dan, I think John is still in the middle of those years.

Mmmmmm hostess cupcakes. WANT

Swiss Cake Rolls are the king

My husband will eat those Little Debbie ones every day if I don't make fun of him about it.

wait there are only 100 calories in nutty bars??????????????

So I could eat like 20 of them and be fine for the day!!!!!!!!!

omg start crunch! i am feeling nostalgic now but i used to get so pissed cause my mom would always buy those instead of something awesome like nutty bars (i think they seemed somehow less bad to her?). they were so freaking sweet and almost molassesy?

when I was a kid, I thought the smell of cilantro was the smell of rabies,

Youu think Jesus is gonna buy this shit?

xpost Eat 20 nutty bars, but don't forget to take a multivitamin or otherwise it's probably Scurvy-land for you, too. And if I had to call you and John both "Scurvy," that would just be confusing.

Maybe you could call me "Rickets"; it wouldn't be accurate but it would be less confusing.

All of this talk of nutritional diseases is reminding me of this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SgayZqbc6Xo&feature=related

I'd like to call you "Beriberi," if at all possible. It would make you sound like a dessert topping.

Somehow I think Dan is fine with that idea.

esp. since I am already a dessert topping

You're probably not going to like the part where I start marketing you that way is all.

My favorite place to get breakfast in Oakland:

http://www.themenupage.com/oaklandgrill.html

http://i349.photobucket.com/albums/q385/frinchfr/little_debbie.jpg

hostess cupcakes = A++++++ would eat again. best hostess product consumed so far.

root beer = jesus fucking christ this is the foulest stuff EVER. for some reason i was expecting it to taste like gingerbeer, but i was completely wrong.

butterfinger = A+
nestle buncha crunch = average, maybe even slightly below average. would not eat again.

Butterfinger = junk food of the GODS

yeah butterfinger is pretty much gold

also RR, if you havent worked it out yet:

US Milky Way = AUS/NZ Mars Bar
US 3 Musketeers = AUS/NZ Milky Way

root beer = jesus fucking christ this is the foulest stuff EVER. for some reason i was expecting it to taste like gingerbeer, but i was completely wrong.

ginger beer is better than root beer, but the quality of the latter can vary widely. if you get over the initial objection, you might find you like the good stuff.

no, jordan got me a good brand, it really is just that root beer flavour i hate. even the smell of it grosses me out. it reminds me of cough syrup or something.

YOU GUYS

I FOUND REESE'S PEANUT BUTTER CUP KLONDIKE BARS IN THE GROCERY STORE

FUCKING SWOON

ho hos: awesome

You should do a side by side taste test with Little Debbie Swiss Cake Rolls! I can't have those in the house due to mindlessly eating entire boxes. They don't exactly taste like chocolate, though they sort of look like it.

I need to know from HI DERE - were the peanut butter cups in the ice cream or smashed into the exterior chocolate coating??? OR (OMG) BOTH??!!

It was peanut butter ice cream with a chocolate coating that I think had bits of peanut butter cups crushed into it (I was really too busy swooning from the PB ice cream to do a proper inventory).

i would love that.

root beer = jesus fucking christ this is the foulest stuff EVER.

Also to avoid: vanilla creme soda and (shudder) red creme soda.

ewww wtf is red cream soda?!

try: dr. brown's cel-ray soda.

Early reviews of Reese's Klondike have been positive.

http://img70.imageshack.us/img70/6610/imageuploadimagepr1.jpg

Also, some versions of RCS appear to be "bubblegum-flavored".

ewww wtf is red cream soda?!

Teh, you claim ignorance, yet you spelled it correctly....

red cream soda is fucking awesome, wtf

possibly the only things I miss from MN more than rcs are family and friends

red cream soda is fucking awesome, wtf

-- HI DERE, Thursday, July 24, 2008 8:26 AM (38 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

right again.

even better - brown cream soda (although maybe this isnt in USA?)

RR, im interested to hear your opinion of dr pepper because to me that tastes like cough syrup too

it makes me think of drinking cotton candy.

thing to try you may have difficulty finding in ca: CHEERWINE.

RR, since you're in the Bay Area, you should try one of our local 'delicacies', the famous and delicious "It's It'

http://rds.yahoo.com/_ylt=A0WTefjhjohI8TUBYmKjzbkF/SIG=12rqbfnqh/EXP=1216995425/**http%3A//googleblog.blogspot.com/uploaded_images/ITSIT_closeup-738293.JPG

I had a mint or coffee It's It almost every day during high school.

what is that glorious-looking thing

Ice cream between two oatmeal cookies covered in chocolate. (The oatmeal makes it good for you, btw.)

Wait, why is Google on the it's-it? Did GOOG consume so much that they had to buy the company?

http://i33.tinypic.com/2v34epv.jpg

no wai!

Whatever's in that can, it's not going to be good.

i am cringing at the thought of what that tastes like. for some reason i'm imagining salty plum-ish beverage.

Spoken as someone who has tried asian snack foods.

i am sure it's much more mountain dew-ish, though.

I think that's just actual Cheetos packed in a drink can - the net weight is 1 1/2 oz. Liquid Cheetos drink would be urgh-bleh-ptttth.

Ah, It's-It -- such a wonderful creation.

michael, where do i get one of those it's-it things from???? someone actually mentioned those to me on the bukowski board i post on, but they just said it was an icecream sandwich (which we have in nz). but that thing looks amazing!!!

sunny: if dr pepper tastes like cough syrup i'm sure as hell not gonna like it.

also: not a big fan of cream soda

Is that was FNM's Epic was about??

Can you feel it, see it, hear it today?
If you cant, then it doesnt matter anyway
You will never understand it cuz it happens too fast
And it feels so good, its like walking on glass
Its so cool, its so hip, its alright
Its so groovy, its outta sight
You can touch it, smell it, taste it so sweet
But it makes no difference cuz it knocks you off your feet
You want it all but you cant have it
Its cryin, bleedin, lying on the floor
So you lay down on it and you do it some more
Youve got to share it, so you dare it
Then you bare it and you tear it
You want it all but you cant have it
Its in your face but you cant grab it
Its alive, afraid, a lie, a sin
Its magic, its tragic, its a loss, its a win
Its dark, its moist, its a bitter pain
Its sad it happened and its a shame
You want it all but you cant have it
Its in your face but you cant grab it
What is it?
Its it

I would totally make John and FB drink a drink based off of a Cheetos beverage.

Well of course you would.

omg that It's It thing. WANT

if i move to mpls some day, i will ensure that this happens
xpost

Cheetotini:

1.5 oz Cheetos brand cheez puffs (baked or fried)
2 oz vodka

Soak Cheetos in vodka for 10 minutes. Whiz with immersion blender until not totally chunky. Shake w/ ice until frosty. Strain into martini glass; garnish w/ pickled onion and 1 whole Cheeto, floated on the top.

That's probably not enough vodka, better go for 4 or 5 oz.

^^^^ I am down with this recipe except for the straining. Also for purposes of being evil I would probably use tequila.

needs a dash of tabasco. or 4.

RR, I don't about the East Bay, but in SF/Peninsula/Marin they're pretty ubiquitous; from liquor stores to supermarkets.

SARA SARA SARA

i went to a see's candy store in sf on saturday and had a SCOTCHMALLOW BAR and it was delicious! do you have them in your town or should i buy some and send them to you?

also: ghiradeli (or however the hell you spell it) chocolate is awesome.

omg the SCOTCHMALLOW chocolates are my favorite. SOOOOOOO glad you had one!

We are See's-less here, sadly (although they come to the malls in December), but you shouldn't try to send chocolate in the summer. Trust me; it just gets ugly. I will just be envious for the time being! And then when it gets colder I will send something to *you*!

Also, I often eat Ghiradelli chocolate because I can buy it at Target. It's not the perfect chocolate, but it's a hell of a lot better than Hershey's. (Confession: I do eat a lot of those Hershey's things, too. If it says "chocolate" on it, I'm probably eating it...)

If it says "chocolate" on it, I'm probably eating it...

nah, too easy

ohhhh i adore hershey's!!

and btw.... there new zealish lolly count is getting low... BLAME JORDAN, NOT ME!! we are going to buy bags tonight and then post them tomorrow, but there's not too much left, and i'm gonna have to chop the perky nanas up so you only get a piece each instead of a whole bar :( sorry guys :(

BUT i found a store in sf that sells nz lollies/choc bars!!

ghiradeli (yah how do u spell that?) mint is the real deal

xp Dan, your restraint is remarkable.

Ghirardelli chocolate is indeed goodness. But Schaffen Berger is right there. Do not ignore it.

mmmmm Schaffen Berger...

and i also have some of those lollipop things from see's - i'm sucking on a butterscotch one right now and it is DIVINE.

Mmmmm those are rather good, too!

I'm getting a cavity filled on Wednesday again, so probably I should avoid lollipops in the future. ;_;

oooh, but my dental hygienist told me that something in dark chocolate protects against cavities. I love to hear that.

If you can find one in SF then you should try a Cuban Sandwich. One of the world's great sandwiches. I am salivating now about my return to the states and a greasy cuban sandwich.

nom nom. i think i need to take a trip to chi just to try a jibarito!

If you can find one in SF then you should try a Cuban Sandwich.

http://paladarcafecubano.com/

cuban sandwich is proof that god exists and that he loves us

I have no idea what a Cuban sandwich is, but if it makes John offer it as proof of GOD, maybe I should find out.

Yeah, the Cuban. SO TASTY

Sara, the cuban is roasted pork and cheese and sometimes salami and other goodies, on cuban bread (kinda like french bread).

Manny's Tortas in Minneapolis has an OK Cuban. Victor's (also in Minneapolis) has an authoritative and delectable Cuban, which is to be expected.

key to the goodness is the inclusion of pickle and mustard
xpost

Basically a ham and cheese, but with hot gangsters and sexy communists warring in the hills and streets of your mouth for control of your enamored and swooning taste-buds.

plus pickles and mustard

Wow. Count me in then!

I'm a sucker for sexy communists.

PORKHAMPICKLEMUSTARDHARDROLLLOLHUEG is the key ingredient duh

Okay, I'm starving now. THX GUYS

PORKHAMPICKLEMUSTARDHARDSWISSROLLLOLHUEG

otm

just bought red vines. pretty fucking revolting.

you must be a twizzler person because you have to be one or the other

red vines taste like medicine. everything here tastes like medicine!!

especially hershey bars

Just wait till you try our medicine, RR!

oh, gag.

i love hershey bars

Did you eat the red Red Vines or the black Red Vines?

Pez tastes like children's cough syrup, IMO.

Also have you eaten HOT WINGS yet???????

Dimetapp YUM!

dimetapp is the BEST

Ugggggg YUCK.

Liquid medicine of any kind makes me want to yak.

However, the mention of Twizzlers upthread made me eat one... despite the fact that I'm in the middle of making brownies.

they were red red vines.

i have a phobia about medicine, since having to take a whole bunch of foul tasting liquid meds when i was a kid.

abbott i have not had hot wiings yet but jordan is out of town all next week so i'm going to eat tons of meaty fast food.

THEY ARE SO GOOD

BE AFRAID

THEIR MIGHT OF FLAVOR MAY KNOCK THE SUN OUT OF ORBIT

I like black red vines, which just taste like licorice. Like licorice root but without the 'I'm eating a tree' vibe.

After J was born, way too fast, with no benefit of any painkillers, and I had hemorrhaged and been through all kinds of nonsense and needed surgery to fix it, I had to take some liquid medicine to make sure that I didn't aspirate anything into my lungs during surgery. The nurses had to talk me into taking it. I was fine with everything else.

(pain, losing way too much blood = apparently fine with me; taking liquid medicine = NOT OKAY)

However, I don't mind black licorice.

Gah, when are the brownies going to be done? I'M HUNGRY

I have to say it is silly and frustrating to name a non-red food 'Red Vines,' but it also feels silly saying 'Red Vines brand black licorice.'

yeah sara i would probably be the same. i physically can't get medicine down my throat - i start gagging. a few years ago, i had a really bad cough so i went to the pharmacist and said 'dude i'm a total baby, give me the cough stuff you have for kids'. it was by far the foulest stuff i'd ever had, so i hate to think what the adult stuff is like. i'd rather cough my lungs out than take liquid medicine.

i also used to have a problem swallowing pills but am a little better now. this phobia i place the blame for squarely on the shoulders of an evil nurse: i was in hospital being treated for juvenile arthritis, and i had to take these enormous capsules (painkillers i presume) but i couldn't swallow them and kept gagging. so the nurse threatened to take away all my toys and colouring books and stuff unless i swallowed it. fucking bitch.

I WANT BROWNIE!!

sara i'll trade you the fresh salsa i just made for your brownies

Yikes, that nurse should not have been working with kids.

I'm okay with pain, but drinking stuff that tastes medicine-y foul... BAD BAD BAD.

Apparently these days you can go to pharmacies and have things flavored specifically to make them taste (supposedly) better, but I suspect the chemicals are just too hard to mask with any flavor. Plus the texture of most medicines is disgusting.

mmmmm fresh salsa!

You could totally have brownies without that offer, but wow that would be great.

Someone please bridge time and space to make this possible!

Brownies have chocolate chips in them, and also oatmeal. They are like a cross between oatmeal chocolate chip cookies and brownies (but leaning toward brownies).

Sara - those sound amazing. Could you post the recipe?

Sure! I will do so as soon as I get dinner out of the way.

I cut it out of a Mpls Star Tribune article sometime in the early 1990s and never lost it.

not that anyone's asking, but here's my salsa recipe:

diced: tomatoes, cucumber, red onion, four colours of capsicumbell pepper, balsamic vinegar, a sprinkling of sugar, salt and lots of pepper and oil. this time i also threw in some red vinegar just to see what would happen. normally i would also add pesto, but this is vegan salsa for jordan. i used fresh basil last time.

Reasonable. But you are now in the LAND OF PROPER SALSA. So you will be competing fiercely with the rest of us.

Make a peach salsa sometime. Is very delicious.

and i finally bought little bag things today for all your lollies:

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3153/2715439466_fe12bf6a9e_o.jpg

there is not much to send... we ate quite a lot of them, sorry guys :/

sara gets a whole perky nana, and the seattlish ppl get one to split between them (we ate the other 3 that i brought over).

ned i don't care what you think of my salsa because MY BF LOVES IT AND HAS BEEN DEMANDING I MAKE A HUGE BATCH OF IT EVERY WEEK SINCE I'VE BEEN HERE and that's all that really matters

tbh, apart from being vegan, jordan is the least fussy/picky person i know.

What is in pesto that isn't vegan? When I make it, it's just garlic, basil, olive oil, pine nuts, and salt.

it usually has parmesan (in the italian restaurant - with a chef from napoli - it did, anyway)

ah, I see. I add the parm separately to whatever dish the pesto's going in.

Apparently these days you can go to pharmacies and have things flavored specifically to make them taste (supposedly) better, but I suspect the chemicals are just too hard to mask with any flavor. Plus the texture of most medicines is disgusting.

Can you make mine taste like a martini, please?

Hey, if they can flavor them in ways to make them appeal to pets (and apparently they do), I don't see why this request would be out of line.

xp MMMMMM salsa sounds awesome, RR. WANT

peach salsa also would be YUM

okay, recipe:

Oatmeal Double Chocolate Brownies

1 cup sugar
2/3 cup (1 stick plus 3 Tablespoons) butter or margarine, softened
2 eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 12-ounce (2 cups) bag chocolate chips, divided
1 1/4 cup flour
1 cup rolled oats (uncooked oatmeal flakes, quick, or old-fashioned)
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 cup chopped pecans
Powdered sugar (optional)

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Grease and flour a 9x13 inch pan.

Combine the sugar and butter in teh large bowl of an electric mixer and beat together until the mixture is uniform and creamy. Beat in the eggs and vanilla.

In a small saucepan over very low heat, melt 1 cup of the chocolate chips, stirring constantly. Beat the chocolate into the butter mixture.

In another bowl, stir together the flour, oats, and baking powder. Beat into the butter-chocolate mixture. Stir in the remaining cup of chocolate chips and the pecans.

The mixture will be very thick and hard to spread, so spoon it into the prepared pan in evenly spaced dollops, then spread them out evenly. Bake 25 to 30 minutes, or until a toothpick inserted in the middle comes out clean. (If you hit a chocolate chip, the toothpick will come out gooey even if the bars are done, so make several tries if it tests not done). Cool completely and sprinkle with powdered sugar, if desired. Cut into 2-inch squares. Makes 24.

(Notes: I always use butter, not margarine; I never put in the pecans because my kids wouldn't eat them then; I use old-fashioned oats. Be careful not to burn the chocolate when you are melting it. I baked these for exactly 25 minutes and they were done, but I suppose it depends on the oven.)

hot weather has reminded me that, if not already mentioned: creamsicles are awesome.

see also: fudgesicle

I would like to see these things, but instead I'm going to try out a Pilates DVD.

You're clearly the smarter of us, tehresa.

Pilates of the Caribbean?

If only it were like that.

With Johnny Depp, I mean.

Otter pops!

i refuse to split a perky nana

RR, you are sweet to want to send me a whole perky nana.

("perky nana" still sounds obscene to me, btw)

well then jergins, i guess it'll just be lxy and remy and lingbert who get to eat perky nana!!

i'm eating pineapple lumps right this second.

and on saturday i ate some snifters.

i just finished a bag of trader joe's dark chocolate covered mini pretzels, and now i feel kinda sick. i knew it would happen, but i couldn't stop eating the fucking things

i ate all the pineapple lumps and now i feel a bit sick too, i also blame them, the fucking things.

im eating bacon and i feel just fine

What, pray, is a perky nana?

sunny wins.

RR how are you adjusting to american bacon? I presume NZ bacon is like UK bacon and if so American is a poor poor poor relation. I am considering boning up on how to cure my own when I move.

do you mean the crispiness of US bacon?

Primarily I mean the lack of availability of longback or middleback bacon, thick slices and a better meat to fat ratio. The best thing about long back is you can have a crispy streaky bit and rind and then a succulent chunk of cured tasty meat.

longback
http://www.graigfarm.co.uk/images/porkbaconlongback150.jpg

middleback
http://www.siop-glasfryn.com/lluniau/siop/bacon.middle.gif

all i noticed was floppy vs crispy

estela where did you find snifters???

ed, i haven't tried any US bacon - my bf is vegan, and despite his insistence that it's okay, i just can't bear to bring meat into our house. but he's away all next week (;_;) so it's going to be a meaty week for me.

and anyway, i'm not a huge bacon aficionado - i like on a sandwich with best foods mayo and tomato and lettuce and red onion, and i like it sometimes with eggs and hashbrowns, but that's about it.

American bacon has it's purposes but it really doesn't compare with good Irish bacon and it's galling that good lardons aren't easily available, too.

I will fight the Irish for any kind of nationalist bacon curing crown.

you guys are making me rly hungry now

i love all the forms of the bacon.

even the mutant kind in the canadian style.

which, being a good american, i prefer to call "freedom bacon".

all this talk about the fineries of salted meat reminds me that RR should look for the shredded beef jerky that comes in a tobacco tin

Is it snorted or chewed? Either sounds good to me.

I can't really comprehend any way of life other tahn loving the shit out of bacon

bacon is a many-splendoured thing

The other thing that bugs me about American meat is how much fat is trimmed off. Whether you like to chew the fat or not (and I do) you can't deny that a layer of fat during cooking makes for more succulent meat after cooking. Clearly I will have to befriend a butcher and get him to do things just so for me.

I am actually friends with my butcher. he buys guitars from me, and his shop is in the exact middle of my path from work to home. Obv what I need to do is stop eating frozen pizzas and chow down on an all meat diet.

I also just realized that there is a full size freezer in my basement that was left by the previous owners and is currently unused.

Try this:

Get 4 porkchops with a thick layer of fat on them. get a very hot skillet. Support themfat side down to start the fat crackling then brown on all sides. Take them out a throw about 10 whole garlic cloves and a few shallots (all in their skins) into he pan and fry a little in the fat and remove. Deglaze the pan with a couple of cuts of hard dry cider or white wine. In an oven proof dish or the skillet if it will go arrange the chops fat poking up along with the onions and garlic. pour on the liquor (make sure the fat pokes above the liquor) add the onions and garlic and a couple of anchovies (salted for preference) cook for about half an hour in a medium hot oven. Take out the chops and reduce the liquor by half. Serve the chops with mashed potatoes and buttered spinach pour on the reduced cooking liquor.

Full size freezer-> go wrestle and elk and bring it home, or at the very least see if a butcher will so you a deal on a whole sheep or a half side of beef.

ive always wanted a chest freezer but in my vision it was packed with ice pops

Black pudding ice pops?

WHY MUST YOU MAKE ME ILL WITH YR BRITISHERS WAYS?

ruby, you can get snifters here, they are not common but they are around, there is a store at the local mall that sells lots of candy from the us and nz and europe that has them (and milk duds).

Try this:

Get 4 porkchops with a thick layer of fat on them. get a very hot skillet. Support themfat side down to start the fat crackling then brown on all sides. Take them out a throw about 10 whole garlic cloves and a few shallots (all in their skins) into he pan and fry a little in the fat and remove. Deglaze the pan with a couple of cuts of hard dry cider or white wine. In an oven proof dish or the skillet if it will go arrange the chops fat poking up along with the onions and garlic. pour on the liquor (make sure the fat pokes above the liquor) add the onions and garlic and a couple of anchovies (salted for preference) cook for about half an hour in a medium hot oven. Take out the chops and reduce the liquor by half. Serve the chops with mashed potatoes and buttered spinach pour on the reduced cooking liquor.

-- Ed, Wednesday, 30 July 2008 16:10 (Yesterday) Link

http://www.aqsu08.dsl.pipex.com/DIBB/homer-drool.gif

I also just realized that there is a full size freezer in my basement that was left by the previous owners and is currently unused.

-- BLACK BEYONCE, Wednesday, July 30, 2008 11:04 AM (Yesterday) Bookmark Link

When I kill my first deer this fall, can I rent space in your freezer? The fee: delicious venison.

Dude, you hunt, too?

Not yet. But soon. Am positive that I will cleanse the kill with my tears.

Ew. And you want people to eat that?!

Fresh Killed Deer
(Salted With a Bear's Tears)

bear's tears vs. bacon salt

I think I've had that in a Boston restaurant

HEY RUBY

STEAK WEEK corndog week PORKCHOP WEEK chicken tender week CARNE ASADA WEEK venison week HAMBURGER WEEK

what what

it is meat week starting next tuesday thru to saturday, while jordan is out of town

i'm scared of eating beef here cuz it seems pretty dodgy

ah hell no just cook it til it's black

Charcoal!

ITR should join the LAxor massif tomorrow for minigolf and margaritas, but most of you are far away.

US beef pretty dodgy in general, until you hit up the farmer's market. Feedlots are a terrible thing to inflict on a cow.

fastfood nation freaked me out

As well it should. You will be OK, if poor if you stick to organic. Sheeps is best eating from a husbandry and sustainability point of view wherever you are in the world.

Kielbasa is pretty good. Polish sausage. Usually it's sold cooked, so not dodgy. Also cheap and yummy.

also fucking amazing cut up with eggs

Whoa, aimurchie! Groovy to see you!

i protest this slanderous smear campaign that you are all mounting against our fine meat-manufacturing industry

every time you complain about a piece of beef, the scientist that grew it in his lab dies, just so you know.

But it all works out, because John then eats those scientists.

He's just complaining about his scientist-meat oversupply.

SOYLENT GREEN IS SCIENTISTS

You know what's really good? Maui beef, which is technically American but not really. I had some really good bacon this morning.

Mmmmmm, or Kobe beef.

Also I am having steaks on the grill for dinner tonight and also corn on the cob. SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW

i had delicious fake chicken at this vegan restaurant in sf. v v good and it was on this fantastic french bread with amazing fake mayonaise.

The fake meat technology these days is kind of scary awesome.

I want the French bread the most, though. Because carbs are where my heart is.

i am all about some fake mayo bc i don't really like real mayo anyway so for lubricating purposes soy mayo is more than passable. fake meat = no, except i have been known to make enchiladas and spaghetti sauce with 'crumblers' but i think that's ok because most ground beef used for that purpose is pretty shit meat anyway and also i have fed it to meat eaters who have not realized it was fake.

I don't do it often, but I like those Morningstar Food Black Bean Burgers. I don't think they are "fake meat" so much as something other than meat entirely, but they're okay. I once had mock duck made of tofu in a Vietnamese restaurant that was astoundingly convincing, though.

I never eat seitan, but I like the idea because it sounds like "SATAN." I'm easily entertained.

That is why I like Morningstar Foods – Lucifer Morningstar aka "SATAN." I was addicted to their corndogs for a long time but $3 for four corndogs is too spendy for me.

I have never tried those because I hate actual corndogs. (Yes, I am unAmerican that way.)

But they are Nature's Perfect Food!

I've never had one either. But I have been to Hot Doug's.

Okay Sara I think you have to leave Minnesota now. How the hell can you hate corn dogs????????

Also this: for lubricating purposes soy mayo is more than passable o_O it's like all of ITR is taunting me to make awful awful joeks

But they are Nature's Perfect Food!

-- Abbott, Monday, 4 August 2008 02:24 (12 hours ago) Bookmark Link

Yup, they scamper around and all you have to do is chop of their wee little legs and deep fry them.

WTF is an "actual" corn dog? It's either a corn dog or it isn't.

Are you hiding some fancypants corn dog experience from us, Sara?

i think she meant actual as opposed to the meatless soy dog corn dogs.

You're right. Sorry Sara. I am still hurting from going to the Sacred Heart of Jesus festival at the Polish Catholic Church yesterday, and they were out of pierogis AND golumpkae. (This is the actual plural for a golumky.)
They still had kielbasa, but that's not what I was lookin for.

I had an interesting chat with a lady who makes prune pierogi - which sounds awful at first, but then you can sort of understand the concept. beyond digestive.
Sort of.

okay a million times yuk to that

i am intrigued.

2 girls 1 pierogi

^^^ Dan's secret fantasy life is alarming me.

Also, sorry; I've never liked corndogs. I hate meatloaf, too. And blue cheese! And baked beans.

But I like almost everything else...

i can handle meatloaf like once a year. but it has to be really good.

I am sure that some people make great meatloaf, but my mother's meatloaf is horrible. She also used to make a truly alarming hot dish that she'd offer to my friends (who always had the sense to refuse). I'm pretty sure she still makes Chef-Boy-Ar-Dee pizza and adds hamburger as a topping... ugggggg. Poor Mom ruined a great deal of food for me.

i feel your pain - my mum microwaved everything from the time i was 3.

I'm a terrible cook myself, but I try not to foist that on others! (Baking = much easier and more fun anyway).

RR - everything?!

Everyone I know who hates meatloaf has liked mine.

my mom is an amazing cook, but infrequently made meatloaf. we had lots of stir fry when i was a kid.

I am envying your childhood, tza.

Dan, I'm semi-tempted to try to get you to make it for me, but the psychological jump to putting meatloaf in my mouth would be pretty high. But I do believe you!

I bet Dan's meatloaf is amazing . It CAN be amazing with the right ingredients.
I was always sort of obsessed with the boiled egg in the middle aspect of a traditional meatloaf.
Probably because it took until I was about ten to realize that the egg was put in there, and didn't boil into an egg shape while cooking in the meatloaf.
I was a very gullible child.

Ahem. Prune pierogi - I did not encounter one, but I felt like I understood the concept - like, any fruit in a dumpling wrapper seems weird, but it might work. I don't know - I'm kind of a sucker for food in an edible wrapper.

Prune pierogi sounds inherently better than meatloaf, but I'm intrigued by this boiled egg talk. (More like baffled, actually).

The super lolworthy thing is that my meatloaf recipe is an augmented version of the Lipton Onion Soup recipe; basically, use A-1 or barbecue sauce instead of ketchup, add in approx. 1/2 cup diced onions and/or 1/2 cup diced peppers, and homemade wheat bread crumbs (toast 2 slices, rub between hands over the meat until transformed into crumbs). This goes with 2 lbs ground beef, 1 packet of Lipton soup, however much water the recipe calls for (3/4?), 1 egg and seasoned salt and pepper to taste. SUPER SUPER SAVORY AND YUMMY, PLUS INCREDIBLY TENDER AND JUICY.

Okay, I loathe the ketchup aspect of meatloaf, but... (I don't really know how to say this... but...) I HATE barbeque sauce. Everyone in my family eats it with everything and the smell of it just makes me cringe.

It might be that I would like it in the meatloaf, though. You never know.

I feel like I have just revealed my deepest, darkest secret.

no, Sara, no! You would like the A-1!
So I guess nobody else had parents or relatives put a boiled egg or three in the meatloaf?
Maybe my family had ingrained protein issues.

It looked nice when you sliced the meatloaf - there was an egg center. I am GOING to research this, but I'm assuming it has to do more with using ingredients before they spoil rather than the slicing elegance.

I like Dan's recipe, especially the bread crumb part.

Okay... so the egg was in the shell or just tossed in there whole, but raw...?

airmurchie, you might be right about the A-1. I have no clue!

sara, today you have committed many food slander crimes that are writ large upon my heart

CORN DOGS
BLUE CHEESE
AND NOW BARBEQUE SAUCE

9_9

I knew that would upset you. Sorry, Irish. (Don't forget that I don't like things that are flavored with artificial grape flavoring, either!)

(I'm not really *that* sorry)

lol sarah that is like how everyone in my famiyl loves ketchup on eggs and i can not stand the thought of it. hot sauce yes, ketchup no.

THREAD TO ESTABLISH PERMANENT EMOTICON TO BE USED IN RESPONSE TO POSTS EXPOSING HATRED OF PERFECT FOODS SUCH AS CORN DOGS

xp I think A. does that to his fried egg sandwiches. I have never tried it, but it seems kind of revolting.

J. will make herself a tortilla with melted cheese and then put a TON of ketchup on it and eat it. She's not even 6 yet. God knows what she'll come up with.

oh also it's obv not a one-to-one replacement of ketchup to A-1 sauce because that would be HELLA LOTTA A-1 SAUCE

Okay, just get over here and I'll buy the ingredients. You can either cook or try to get me to do it. (warning: I suck at it)

Two or three whole boiled eggs, out of shell (c'mon now!) are placed in the meatloaf construction, and they just cook away while the meatloaf is cooking. Apparently I am the only person on this thread who is familiar with this.
Should it be a secret, NOT passed on to further generations? Yes. Is it yummy? Gotta say yes!
But now I'm just scaring Sara.

I'm not afraid!

And the reason I asked (seriously) about whether it was in the shell or not is that there is this recipe for some kind of Easter bread in one of our bread machine cookbook where you cook an egg in the center - dyed - in the shell. I have NO CLUE how you eat it... I hope it's just decorative.

oh yeah... my mom has done that before i think but i am clueless on the shell bit.

If you ever find out, please tell me. It's been bugging me for ages!

Wait Sara, that's a BREAD MACHINE RECIPE???

Yes, but I'm sure it is one that you start the dough in the bread machine and then you form it with your hands and bake in your oven.

A. does a phenomenal chocolate babka that starts in the bread machine and then goes to the oven. Soooooo awesome. He's also made pumpkin bagels starting in the bread machine. They were AMAZING.

(I may not love meat, but I can't think of any bread products I don't enjoy...)

i want a bread machine!

i don't even own a toaster, though. baby steps.

Toaster over >>>>> toaster.

But yeah, bread machines rule all.

dialogue from the brilliant movie flirting:

A big, steaming meatloaf appears on the table. The boys all seem to retch simultaneously, prompting:

Teacher: Again?
Green: It's the elephant, sir.
kid #1: Last time I was in the toilet for an hour.
Teacher: What are you talking about?
kid #1: He means the elephant dick, sir.
Teacher: What is elephant dick, Green?
Green: Meat loaf with egg in the middle, sir.
Teacher: I'll see you in my office after prep.
Green: Yes, sir.
Teacher: You think it's funny?
Green: No, sir. Elephant dick, sir.

http://images.teamsugar.com/files/upl0/16/161593/13_2008/flirting.jpg

thandie newton, nicole kidman, naomi watts

How do so many movies exist that I have never heard of?

that one is one of the best. you must see it, it is a rare and wondeful treat.

plz say it includes a pillow fight between TN, NK and NW

Dan's so easy.

I'll add it to my Netflix queue. Assuming I ever get to be able to see it again.

as a matter of fact, dan, you're not that far off...

i finally found the little debbie products at our local supermarket!!! so tonight i tried little debbie swiss rolls - delish!!

and: pepperidge farm soft baked milk choc and macadamia cookies - also delish!

when i lived in sydney the supermarket across the street suddenly by magic one day had a pepperidge farm display and i went on a jubilant milano cookies binge because i had missed them terribly but then about a month later the whole thing vanished, it was worse than if they'd never appeared in the first place.

estela, how cruel that must have been! I'm a sucker for those milano cookies myself.

xp YUM

I just ate a hot fudge sundae made with Haagen-Dazs vanilla ice cream and hot fudge sauce I made... whoa, so good. Sadly, now I have to go burn it off on the treadmill. ;_;

just don't it.

Too late.

But today and tomorrow = days off from exercise program I follow. YAY!

Plus all you can eat Mongolian Barbeque tonight with friends. Double YAY. And someone else is driving, so I can drink and not worry about it. SO EXCITED ABOUT HAVING FUN TONIGHT

woah nom.

i was attempting to be healthy and also utilize my amazing food processor, purchased a few months ago - so I made a broccoli pesto. Which turned out really well , except that I have this tendency to think that you can never really have enough garlic. Which is sort of true if you're sauteeing (that accent would be useful. also spellcheck) but not so much when everything is raw.

Anyway, I never though about using fresh veggies as a pesto - and it's so easy! The recipe I saw was for peas, I just happened to have broccoli on hand.

Too much garlic - tummy aches. It's like an invitation to acid reflux. I assume I have really thin blood right now.

Which is awesome because I'm going to see a doctor in an hour 1/2. I'm the picture of health!

neighborhood pizza place showdown 2008? MISSION ACCOMPLISHED WINNER FOUND

http://www.thepizzashopsite.com/

Food great? We'll have to hit that some time.

pizza is like some mix of savoy and old-school carbones before they started to suck

also, no tables, you take your pizza and walk around eating it or crouch in a corner LIKE A MAN

plus, you can buy a '74 yellow dodge dart sport from them (in case you didn't check out the additional links)

TAIGHT

I would eat my pizza with one foot up on the bumper. That's a good man-stance.

God I'm starving right now.

Wait, so Carbone's pizza isn't good anymore? It's not my imagination? I have had some at my parents house in HSTNGS and it did not live up to my memory of it.

xp airmurchie - good luck at the dr!

Justine, when your stomach has recovered, remind me to send you some distinctly Irish synthetic trash to eat as a housewarming present.

AIMURCHIE can i have your broccoli pesto recipe please?

T, that would be awesome!! i'm still trying to find that wildeirish dark cherry chocolate online.

i changed my mind about those pepperidge cookies, i think i should have gotten dark choc ones with pecans instead.

I thought you weren't so into the dark chocolate one? I can send you more no problemo tho!

no i loved the dark chocolate dark cherry one! it was actually (and still is) the best chocolate i have ever eaten. it was milk chocolate toffee latte one that i couldn't eat (can't stand coffee or coffee flavour) but my housemate LOVED it.

I had that the other way round, weird I sent you coffee, I too hate it as well, I suppose I just assume everyone else loves it!

Anyway, you'll have to send me your address or it's going to wellington!

i will definitely do that!

RR, send me your address, too, so that when it cools off here I can send something your way. I promise to try not to lose it.

I <3 PRESENTS IN THE MAIL

Everyone does!

esp. dan

addresses have been emailed!

I got mine!

You should just email everyone you know though. You might not come across so well in that setup, but it increases the number of presents you stand to get!

that is an excellent idea!

this would be a good time to admit that i am going to secret santa hell. my person's gift is still on my desk waiting to be mailed. :( :( i am a jerk. (it's not any of you, though). someone remind me to bring it to work and mail tomorrow! though i feel like i should buy extra presents to put in now.

little debbie's fudge brownies: not that great

You know what I really want? A vanilla Charleston Chew. I have no idea why.

i think the key to little debbies is to eat the varieties that are things you could not normally make easily/well at home - like nutty bars or swiss rolls or star crunch.

little debbie's fudge brownies: not that great

-- Rubyredd, Friday, August 8, 2008 6:52 PM (13 minutes ago)

;_;nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

sorry BB, i think i mostly didn't like it cuz i could sort of detect a coffee flavour (quite often the case in dark choc objects).

now i'm eating a box of glazed donut holes (YUM) and i has two mini pepperoni frozen pizzas in the oven.

i am getting PHAT.

You must walk more

I have this habit of posting to threads and then just going away for a few weeks...so, Broccoli Pesto:

All you REALLY need is a food processor.
You cannot make it without one. Maybe a blender would work.
It's just a basic pesto, except you are using broccoli (or peas) instead of basil. I think anything green that's fresh - or anything fresh, because tomatos would certainly be good, added, in small amounts, too - but then it's getting towards a salsesque thing and...is anyone still following me?

So the measurements should be:
1/2 - 2 cloves garlic
2Tablespoons pinenuts, or walnuts (I hate pinenuts, oddly, so...)
1/2 cup good olive oil (you'll probably add more)
1/2 cup grated parmesan, fresh (of course Parmegianno- Reggiano is always going to be reccomended.)

2 cups of whatever greens you are going to use.

I have recently enjoyed a broccoli-arugula combo. I also have put in some weirder hard cheeses, like Gruyere.
The thing is, you're going to blend everything, taste it, add stuff - but just keeping in mind it will be served on/in/about steaming pastas - or on crusty bread, so it will have an anchor.

I'm kind of a clean-the-fridge cook. I hate throwing food away, so I just make different things work together. But I like the pesto route because there is virtually no "cooking" involved. You just keep blending stuff.
I also think it is SORT OF healthy, because it is fresh vegetables and herbs. But it's the cheese and the olive oil that bind it, so not sure about the health benefits!

It's REALLY great, once you figure out what you love to combine, because you can freeze it. (For months, probably years) And that's instant dinner, just add pasta.
Tell me what you come up with ! Don't forget salt. lemon juice can cut it if it's too thick and you don't want to add more oil. SOME people even add butter, which will make anyone who eats it worship you, but...I'm trying really hard to avoid my favorite food, butter.
Good luck!
(Plus, are there any greens that YOU know about that might work?)

bread tastes like a tablespoon of sugar

YES AND I DON'T LIKE IT

i cannot fucking find any sliced bread that is grainy and not-sweet. anywhere.

thanks for the brocco-pesto recipe, aimurchie!

I think I missed the sugary bread thing - like, in regular bagged loaves of supermarket bread?

Hmmmm that recipe looks good.

RR - have you tried local bakeries as opposed to whatever packaged stuff they sell in the stores? I haven't solved my grainy-bread love problem either (no one else in my house wants to eat anything other than white or a rather tepid wheat bread from the store). But I'm in a small town in Minnesota; surely in the Bay Area there is great bread to be found!?

My parents INSISTED on whole wheat bread, so all I craved was peanut butter on Wonder Bread. (Is Wonder Bread familiar to you, RR? It is a sin against bread. Possibly against humanity.) I'm sure there's an N.Z. version.
I rarely see it anymore - it was a very prototypical foodstuff for us seventies types.

bakeries are the way to go - and/or also stores that have bakeries, even the Safeways, will work with you on bread and other baked goods.

RR, give up you have to buy the fancy bread and slice yourself, I'm afraid.

I am still on the hunt for a yoghurt that is like a british yoghurt. I can't find a plain one that is both sour and creamy and not set. There is a lot of good set yoghurt out there.

rr try one of the ezekiel breads maybe? they tend to be v. grainy and much less sweet.

oooh, broccoli pesto. I like basil and the idea of pesto but for some reason it does nothing for me - maybe I will try this!