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I got my hair-cut on Saturday, and I found the whole thing most uncomfortable. The awkward, polite-meaningless conversation, watching the hairdresser threaten to screw up your hair in the mirror... Am I the only one to feel like this? Does anyone else have a peculiar phobia? (Hairdressers or other)

― Will, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Anyone going anywhere nice on their holidays? New answers.

― Will, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

yes, i'm scared of them too!

― gareth, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I've had to change hairdressers recently, AL (The God Of Rock) wouldn't like me going to my old Turkish Cypriot barber.

― DG, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

There are a lot of cypriot barbers around, huh? are they all followers of "The Arse"? -nal that is. I always joked with the GREEK cypriot barber in Queen's Park when he put up his price from 5 to 6 quid, that i'd have to move. then i did. for bonus points, i once got my hair cut on cyprus.

― Alan Trewartha, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I used to be scared of hairdressers, until I realised the trick is to talk as much bollocks as they do, and now they're scared of me.

My most disturbing hairdresser was an otherwise amiable chap who would insist on showing me pictures of people who had had limbs severed and/or mutilated as a result of shark attacks. One photograph showed a particularly unfortunate young lady who had both her legs severed just above the knee. My hairdresser's response was a somewhat worrying "Still, smashing tits though".

― Trevor, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

My answer to the pre-Xmas "What are you putting off?" thread was getting my hair cut, so - yes obv.

Hairdresser's are one of the curses of modern city life (not like your old-fashioned barbers in the sticks where it's chew 'em up and spit 'em out ASAP, and so a less uncomfortable proposition all round). Putting off the trip of course only makes things worse: - "long time since you had it cut last, then?" (unmouthed retort: no, the 70s are back, man, where have you been?). The best solution I've found is to delay but then go to the most expensive salon in town, where a degree of competition for custom exists so they have to be nice to you - and they generally do quite sensuous shampoos too.

― Jeff W, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I need to get my haircut! Luckily, the barber never talks to me, as he adminsters my 10 minute £5.50 haircut! I'm just always worried that they will shave my hair or something, as I can't see what they are doing without me glasses on.

― james, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Oh aye. The mere sight of a red and white stripy pole gives me the howling fantods. Hence my hairstyle's ceaseless oscillation between very short and shaggy mop.

― RickyT, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I am terrified, to the extent that I haven't visited one in five years. Before that I had annual excursions which were somehow more unpleasant than going to the dentist. You're not expected to talk to your dentist, well, more discouraged, really. Hairdressers, however are hell. They do awful things to your hair, then want you to talk. I like the up and down and spinny chairs though.

― alix, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I'm absolutely terrified of PROMISCUOUS CLOWNS!

― Brian MacDonald, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I can't decide if my hero for this thread is Trevor or Brian.

― Dan Perry, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

i am too scared of hairdressers. they always wanna experiment and you end up looking like a sideshow freak. even when you specifically say to them what you want done. i get my freinds to cut my hair cos i always know exactly what i want - a bob - and they know how to do it right.

― di, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Brian gives me quivers.

I'm friends with a couple of hairdressers, and were I into short hair I'd have them do the cutting. But I'm not.

― Ned Raggett, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

My main fear is that I will somehow not follow proper tipping etiquette.

― rosemary, Monday, 7 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Watching Private Parts last night NEd I have realised you are the ginger Howard Stern (with much better opinions o'course).

― Pete, Tuesday, 8 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I either have downright ph3ar and don't say anything, or I brazen it out and invent the stupidest lie evah. On the other thread I see that a potential lie was to be a Rocky Horror show extra! That is quite a good one. But I am broke and poor and haf now started cutting my own hair.

My phobia last night was the ph34r that I could not defend myself if an ORC came to my house and wanted to START SUMMINK. And this morning I saw a wisp of smoke suddenly appear by a house. My reaction: ARGH!!! IS THAT VOLDEMORT??? Ah, it is a heater thing. OR DRACULA!!!!!!!

― Sarah, Tuesday, 8 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I had my haircut as soon as I got home as it is much cheaper here. (9 quid at a decent unisex salon!). It was the first time in my life that I enjoyed the time I spent there, in a truly Almodovarian scene: fantastically funny gay hairdresser with a degree in Spanish and girl deceived by the Houllebecq-sque mysogynia of her predominantly alpha male workmates and bosses find out that they share an ex-boyf with bisexual literary celebrity and exchange email adresses in case they both go and live in UK some time again.

I am wishing my hair grows quicker than evah!

― Arantxa, Tuesday, 8 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I'm terrified. Like if I was getting the back and sides shaved I wouldn't mind, but I just get it all cut with the scissors and lots of hairdressers are shit at doing that. And the worst part is like you say "not too much off, just tidy it up a bit" and the guy is in the middle of cutting your hair and he takes a certain length between his fingers and is like "is that enough?". How do I fuckin know? Safe option is to not let them do anything with it. Unless you're paying good money for it, then I'd trust them.

― Ronan, Tuesday, 8 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I love having my haircut - I'm a complete tart when it comes to letting anyone run their fingers through what's left of my hair - apart from the dreaded moment when the barber whips out the old cutthroat razor. Many years ago a barber gave me a v. nasty cut on one side of my face with a cutthroat, and so now I always tense up when they do my sidies and neck w/ one. I'd ask them not to use one at all, but I don't want to appear a wuss.

― Andrew L, Tuesday, 8 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Oh and Pete is totally otm about Ned and Howard Stern. I thought the exact same thing last night. The question is, how many women has Ned given orgasms to over the air.

― Ronan, Tuesday, 8 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Howard has actually dedicated himself to looking more like Ned, with his new glasses. It's a bit uncanny, really.

As for hairdressers, I have no problem with them but since my usual hairdresser messed up and gave me an Amelie haircut last time I might be more apprehensive next time.

― Nicole, Tuesday, 8 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I dont like getting my hair cut, but its been maybe 7 months so I probably should. A friend of mine is a "hair stylist" and so the conversation maybe bollocks but always entertaining. Because I cannot be trusted to make good styling choices for myself I leave it to the professionals to tell me what to do. I have not had an utter disaster yet- perhaps because I dont care about my hair style?

― Menelaus Darcy, Tuesday, 8 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I wish I could find a hairdresser who fully understands that if a client is slightly receding they need to make subtle adjustments to how they would normally do a haircut.

― David Inglesfield, Tuesday, 8 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I have just seen Private Parts courtesy of Katies amazing VCR, and blimey, the Ned thing is sooo true. Though Ned is much more attractive than Mr Stern and, more importantly, not such a jerk.

― RickyT, Tuesday, 8 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Note Ned's astounding silence on this thread. Knives are being sharpened as we type.

― Dan Perry, Tuesday, 8 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

I too fear hairdressers. I cannot understand them. Every one i've ever had has ranged from strange-DUMB to sadistic. They always act like i'm really weird for whatever i want even though it's not. and if i've been cutting my own hair really badly inbetween cuts (which i tend to do 'cause i can't stand the feel of it past a certain length) they act like i've done something really really naughty or crazy. they usually manage to do something that really hurts too. and they put stinky goopy stuff, which they seem to call "product", in my hair before i can stop them. and then brush my hair backwards all poufy. they always seem to be trying to make my haircut more feminine. i hate looking in mirrors in other peoples presence so that adds to the torture. i hate it when they ask me if i have a boyfriend. once one asked me something like if i thought russell crowe was a hunk. when i was little i curled my fingers in my hair at night so i had lots of knots and once there was a particularly painful hairdressing incident where they spent a long time yanking the knots with a comb and they seemed really really angry at me. i really need to find a friend who can cut hair, like for $10 or whatever.

― e a m, Tuesday, 8 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

i am scared of hairdressers to the extent that i let my mother cut my hair yesterday.

― di, Wednesday, 9 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

ABOUT THIS HOWARD STERN THING

I don't listen to the guy. I don't pay attention to his regular doings. I know he exists. I've seen bits and pieces of him on TV. Though I was a DJ for about a decade and have long hair and glasses, I AM NOT TRYING TO BE HIM (though I'm flattered by the idea of the reverse, more people should be me!).
Back in the mid-nineties, the commentary around the station about the purported link reached its height when someone doctored the Private Parts image and Photoshopped my head onto Howard's body. Oh dear. ;-)
Regarding women and orgasms on the air -- well, allegedly I have a very good radio voice indeed, but I have never been offered proof of my abilities in this specific area. D'oh.
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 10 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Bah, I only wanted the first line to be the standout one!
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 10 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

Could life ever be sane again?
― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 10 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

What I hate most about hairdressers is when they snip next to your ears. And those electric razors that rip hairs out of your neck. I tend to squirm and flinch in the barber chair.

On the other hand, getting a hair dresser who is cute is always nice.

― bnw, Thursday, 10 January 2002 01:00 (twenty-three years ago) link

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Does anyone else have a phobia of hairdressers?

ABOUT THIS HOWARD STERN THING