This is the best restaurant review I've ever read, and it is for a pizza buffet

http://www.eastbayexpress.com/ebx/pig-out-at-pepes-pizza-buffet/Content?oid=2615089

Almost every line of this is gold, but some lines are platinum:

"Doughnut-delicious yet earthy-sophisticated as befits pizza, it's what cerebral urban circus clowns might eat."
"You can build your own tacos at the dozen-options taco bar. But subvert the dominant paradigm."
"A young Mandarin-speaking couple watch a worker set out two piping-hot new pizzas, then eagerly serve themselves. This is how you might imagine restaurants in the future, on space stations: international, unlimited, ship-shape, and cheap."

Pepe's disproves the meme that poverty leads to obesity because (as that meme says) the poor cannot afford nutritious food.

This is a meme now?
Would be happy to never see a hyphenated compound ever again.

Anneli Rufus is the author of five critically acclaimed books, including Party of One: The Loners' Manifesto and Stuck: Why We Can't (or Won't) Move On. She also writes for AlterNet, the Daily Beast, Psychology Today, the Huffington Post, and other venues.

hi I wrote a poem about yr pizza buffet

squeaky-clean
stainless-steel
self-serve
in-house
dozen-plus
ginger-sesame
butter-brushed.
Doughnut-delicious
earthy-sophisticated
chip-stuffed
Cold-drink
peach-flavored
Soft-serve
self-service
bargain-buffet
mixed-lettuce
blue-cheese
squeeze-bottle's
ever-changing
crispy-chewy
thickish-crusted
dozen-options
ladybug-red
snot-green
wall-size
ear-splitting
mega-TV
Mandarin-speaking
piping-hot
All-you-can-eat
round-trip
minimum-wage
All-you-can-eat
low-fat
low-carb
gluten-free

We didn't want this pizza.

It is written by Liz Lemon!

http://www.eastbayexpress.com/binary/02b8/anneli.jpg