JJJUSTEN GOES TO HAWAII WHILE THE REST OF YOU SAD SACKS ROT AT HOME

no real purpose here other than to rub it in and stop by with regular reports of how awesome my life is etc

give me the name of your hotel so I can have a flaming bag of dicks sent up to your room

srsly tho have an awesome time

Have fun in gr8080land!

i hope there's poo in your poi

i hope there's lice on your lei

i hope there's herpes in your hula

http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l2xvxx0F2t1qze191o1_250.jpg

ok if i show henry that picture hes going to be even more angry at me when i return for leaving him behind

tbf that dog doesn't look overly enthralled or anything

it is a quiet inner peace, barely observable to the naked eye

or he is confused and scared shitless

it's the same peace bruce lee has before you die at his hands i reckon.

i hope there's herpes in your hula

― goth barbershop quartet (DJP), Thursday, March 3, 2011 10:17 PM (9 minutes ago)

you say this wherever i am tho

"oh hey running to the store to get some eggs"

"well i hope there's herpes in your hula then"

i will also thx to some frequent flyer trickery courtesy of a fellow traveler be flying first class for the first and assuredly last time, so that should be weird.

apparently they have wifi in first class, but use some jamming technology so the serfs and plebes in the last 70 rows dont get any. in case you were wondering whther airlines were still assholes.

it's called product differentiation, if we didn't do it then nobody would have actual jobs, trotsky

wait, they have jobs in ireland now? celtic dragon in full effect, good on you guys

we're taking a national break for our nerves you heartless bastard

Just when I almost liked you, I have to hate you again!

Er, I mean, have a great time!!!

i live only to give focus to your unfettered rage

its pretty sunny in sydney today possibly even sunnier than haiwaii fyi

http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l2xvxx0F2t1qze191o1_250.jpg

SurFur!

xp have fun but know that I'm making a voodoo doll of you wearing a lei and a hula skirt

On a plane yall

awesome, I have some jolly middle fingers for you

they think you are #1, both of them

Your hands are the greatest!

We'll all mourn when John is eaten by a shark after having too much to drink at a luau.

But that doesn't mean we won't still make hula-skirt wearing voodoo dolls of him.

"eaten by a shark" is the weirdest euphemism for hungover and puking

Oh hey LAX, what a shithole

didn't someone try to mug yr dad there?

my only regret from my hawaii hols was not getting my ass in gear and meeting up with gr80 ;__;

Ok they aren't kidding about how amazing it smells when you get off the plane here o_O I'm kinda blown away

probably a little late for this, but if you haven't picked this up, you totally should, worth every penny.
http://www.amazon.com/Maui-Revealed-Ultimate-Guidebook-Second/dp/0971727902
http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51a1bS4QJQL.jpg

okay, breaking down in super-envy now. HAPPY NOW, Hawaii residents and guests?!

Thx gr8080! I asked the hostess at the restaurant tonight if there were any decent bars that weren't cheesy touristy places and she gave me a depressed look that probably comes w/ the territory when you are 22 and living in town just outside of a billion resorts.

So far just wandering around on foot seems to be the way to go. Had fun getting the shit beat out of me by the ocean. The fish is so insanely good it defies description. Loving this 1000%.

you guys should go to Little Beach tomorrow.

lotsa naked hippie drum circle shit but its actually super fun and the sunset is beautiful from over there, kind of once in a lifetime type shit. bring food+booze. sunday's really the only good day to go, i'm told the rest of the week its basically gay tourists looking at each other's dicks.

http://mauimoonnews.com/hawaiinews/2011/02/1337/

^^^ so they don't do this on Sundays because it's the Lord's day and they respect that or what?

Hawaii is more confusing than I thought it would be, but I'm going to blame that on still being stuck in Minnesota.

Whoa snorkeling is the fucking shit!

Signed a dude who is swimming in the ocean for the first time

aw, have fun jj!

are you going to meet gr8080 when you're there or are you on a different island?

am wondering if 'snorkelling' is the slang term for what they don't do on sundays?

yours is not to wonder why, yours is to rot at home.

rotting at home has a lot going against it, but at least it's not onomatipaiecally sinister

jeez for a word that means what it does it's a real pain to spell.

Gr8080 and I are on different islands unfortunately. Nice to have gotten advice from him for all of this tho! I just saw the huge banyan tree in lahaina and it was o_O

I went snorkeling in the Keys in 1990 (yes, the infamous Spring Break of Great Expectations era) - and it was AMAZING. I have never had the opportunity since, but would do it again in a second. So envious right now!!!

jjjjj, if you are on maui i can't recommend a haleakala sunrise enough. it's super freezing and you have to get up WAY early but it's SO SO SO worth it.

am not freaked out about my own safety so much as that of the millions of people staring the big walls of fury in the face

This being itr I would be remiss if I did not bring attention to "big walls of fury in the face"

i am the fucking warlock of big walls of fury in the face

Good on you

mate

Btw if people are worried about my stores of life sustaining supplies I am a little low on beer but we barely touched the tequila so we should be good for several hours before crisis strikes

gonna miss yr awful modding.

We never did get to shoit those zombies *tear*

As I vanish below the waves I promise that my last moments will be spent holding up my iPhone and banning you you terrible terrible man

audible l

submerge ban, reached 51 knots

http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_l2xvxx0F2t1qze191o1_250.jpg

good luck surf rescue dogs

glad you guys are still hanging in there, worried about you and K

I can't think of anything more coherent to say than "holy shit" and "stay safe"

Don't know you jjj, but fervently hoping you're ok anyhoo - hopefully hotel wifi is down and people are enjoying 4th floor cameraderie while very small waves lap at the lobby steps.

As a man who's lived through a number of unforgettably fun hurricane parties, I can only commend you on saving the Tequila. Stay safe.

damn dude

not a praying man but this is serious

yeah for real, thoughts are with you two

Hey dudes, everything is fine other than cel service being shot to hell. Long night though. 6 foot waves!

phew

righteous

*relief*

Hope your travel home is MUCH less exciting than the past 12 hours must have been...

So I missed this thread until now. Foolish me.

Hey Ned: the last place I was in Hawaii before getting on a plane last nite was La Mariana Sailing Club aka site of the Ask Ned Raggett videos.

Guess what the only place on Oahu to sustain structural damage was?

http://www.staradvertiser.com/news/breaking/117805008.html

Yargh. Well...hurrah for good timing!

is it entirely uncool for me to make a 'mod shook' comment now that we know you're ok?

it's uncool i knew it ;_;

i loled

we'll share out the sb's so ;_;

i am immune!

ha, figures

gonna plead retroactive entrapment when i hit 51

JJ, you didn't have anything to do with this, did you?

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=afb_1300000047

Am I the only one who only found out it WASN'T called the "killer whale" volcano after a long time, btw?

i have so many pictures to upload but i am making no promises

did you do haleakela? i got my first clear view of its summit as i flew over it yesterday O_O

didnt make it, but i will be going back and doing that for sure, because apparently through no effort on my part i am now a timeshare owner o_O. which is totally weirding me out at the moment, since i am by nature a poor and miserly small business sad sack.

KISS THE RING

no but seriously it kinda freaks me out.

haha my bestie's mom sells time shares on Maui-- where did you buy?

well i didnt but fam of future wife did and put it under our names as well @ westin.

btw hawaii is pretty much the coolest shit ever - i am not a tropical vacation cancun dude so i didnt really know what to expect but holy shit, so awesome and weird - glad i got some inside scoop info from dudes who ran a zipline course that got me to the crazy (not hana) one lane road on the north end of west maui, shit is amazing.

oh damn, lucky you!

tiny admission here: i have always kinda assumed that timeshares were bullshit, but apparently if you spend enough money you get some pretty amazing shit. plus you get reciprocity with all sorts of places so uh abu dhabi here i come!

okay how can I get K's family to adopt me, exactly?

*envious!*

i feel like a trophy wife, but i am old and my good years are obv behind me so

^^^ confused abt whether I should agree or not bc I am even older

I'd better go get my beauty sleep, don't want to be a total hag until after John and K get married.

Why? Because if I look presentable, maybe K's parents will adopt me...

I will swap you my NYC timeshare for your Hawaii timeshare

good luck making a living selling stuff to hip kids, you timeshare-owning sellout FRAUD